Empathy is often hardest to deploy when faced with negative behaviors or attitudes. In these circumstances it is very easy to judge both the situation and the person in a negative way. In these circumstances, I have found it useful to remind myself of something that leadership expert Peter Docket wrote about in his book, Leading from the Jump Seat. There Docker describes how all negative action stems from fear, while on the other hand positive action stems from love. If faced with a situation where you are negatively judging a person and struggling to respond empathetically, take a beat and try to understand what may be happening under the surface — what fears may be triggering the behaviors that you don’t like in the person you are dealing with and what fears their behavior maybe triggering in you.
We had the pleasure of interviewing Chris Stanley. Chris is the Managing Director of WOBI USA, a leading global business content hub and the organization behind the annual World Business Forum New York. As a leader in the executive education space, Chris has more than 20 years’ experience working with diverse global teams in the development of compelling management content and executive education solutions. His work is focused on meeting the changing knowledge needs of business leaders around the globe to help them lead their teams and companies more effectively.
Over the years he has worked with some of the world’s brightest minds including Nobel Prize winners, Prime Ministers and Presidents, CEOs of global companies, and top business academics, curating content to produce in-person and digital learning programs focused on today’s critical management and leadership topics. In addition he has had the privilege of interviewing and moderating events with many high profile figures from business, politics and academia — both in-person and virtually.
Since 2018 he is proud to have worked as WOBI’s Managing Director in North America as well as serving as the organization’s Global Content Director.
A native of Manchester, England, he studied Social and Political Science at the University of Cambridge and has lived and worked in London, Madrid, Buenos Aires and New York City.
Thank you so much for joining us in this interview series. Before we dive into our discussion about empathy, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you share with us the backstory about what brought you to your specific career path?
Serendipity. I joined WOBI in 2005 when I was living in Madrid, originally to work on a specific project based out of our office there. The connection came via a friend of a friend. I was immediately engaged by the company’s mission to inspire ideas, the commitment to excellence and the amazing people whom I found on the programs of the different events the company was organizing around the world — people like Colin Powell, Jack Welch, Henry Kissinger, Garry Kasparov, Tom Peters and Jim Collins (yes, the vast majority were men, something that has changed over time). Looking back to that time, I could never have imagined, the path that I would end up taking with WOBI. On reflection, I believe my passion for what we do is what opened opportunities in a variety of different roles in different countries over the past nineteen years. I spent ten years in Buenos Aires, where I led corporate marketing and communications before taking on an ever-greater role in the development of the company’s content and relationships with our speakers. For the last seven years I have been based in New York City, where I have had the privilege of leading our US operation and continuing to develop our content globally.
Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you started your career?
It is impossible to highlight one story as the most interesting. This industry is constantly throwing curveballs, and it consistently keeps you on your toes. I suppose one of the most interesting parts of my job (at least from my perspective!) are the amazing people who I have met and learned from over the years. I must have interviewed more than 500 of the world’s smartest and most successful people from the field of business and beyond and done so in many cases on stages in front of thousands of people. Embracing Andre Agassi with tears in his eyes at the Koch Theater, Lincoln Center when he received a standing ovation from the audience there; Sir Richard Branson cutting my tie off (literally, with a pair of scissors he had secretly brought onto the stage with him) during our conversation at the World Business Forum New York; listening to stories from legends in their field like James Cameron and Michael Phelps; or getting first hand lessons in leadership from iconic CEOs such as Indra Nooyi and Ginni Rometty. This is just one part of my work, but one which has been immensely fulfilling and which I never take for granted.
What do you think makes your company stand out? Can you share a story?
The quality of the content WOBI offers, the partnerships we build with our speakers, the commitment to serving our clients, the impact we have on them and their organizations, and the ability to do what we do on four continents for over 35 years. We saw the benefit of this during the pandemic, which had the potential to take WOBI under. It was inspiring to see how the relationships and goodwill we had built up over the years with all our stakeholders, allowed us to pivot our business and come out the other side stronger than ever.
You are a successful business leader. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?
Passion (as mentioned earlier). It is what inspires you to go the extra mile when it comes to making a positive impact on our clients and their organizations. I think it is also felt by those with whom you work.
Resilience and adaptability. This is a challenging industry, constantly changing. WOBI is also a company that is constantly moving and evolving. Being able to adapt and react positively in often fast changing and volatile circumstances — from global financial crises to global pandemics — has been very important.
Global mindset. I have worked with stakeholders all over the world. The ability to forge relationships with people in different countries and see the bigger picture in terms of how actions and decisions have the potential to impact the entire organization, has also been critical through my journey at WOBI.
How do you define empathy in a leadership context, and why do you believe it’s a vital trait for leaders to possess in today’s work environment?
It is a critical skill. In some ways all the decisions you take as a leader are people decisions. If you can engage with how your decisions may impact your people at an emotional level, and how their behavior in such circumstances will often be a consequence of those underlying emotions rather than with the decision itself, then you will be much more effective in building acceptance and buy-in for the decisions you make.
Can you share a personal experience where showing empathy as a leader significantly impacted a situation or relationship in your organization?
The pandemic was obviously a huge challenge in this regard. Overnight work dynamics changed, and people’s lives more broadly were turned upside down. With a business so dependent on revenue from in-person events, uncertainty was rife as to what the future would hold. Honest and consistent communication — both as a team and on a one-to-one basis — proved crucial in getting through this period. I was very open about the uncertainties we faced as an organization and the emotions people were feeling personally in that period. It allowed us to stay together as a team and be successful as we pivoted our business model and launched a series of innovations during that period. I do my best to remember the lessons learnt during that period as we face new challenges as an organization today.
How do empathetic leaders strike a balance between understanding their team’s feelings and making tough decisions that might not be universally popular?
It is not even a balance. It is when tough decisions must be made that empathy is most important. How you connect with someone when communicating a decision that you know they will not like, showing not only the why behind the decision but also an ability to put yourself in their shoes and view it from their perspective, is a really important part of the process of taking any difficult decision.
How would you differentiate between empathy and sympathy in leadership? Why is it important for leaders to distinguish between the two?
In the same way as with any human relationship. Sympathy is feeling sorry for someone and their situation. Empathy is showing that you understand that person and the emotional impact of the situation. By demonstrating empathy, you build a connection, broader engagement and over time more resilient and high performing teams.
What are some practical strategies or exercises that leaders can employ to cultivate and enhance their empathetic skills?
Empathy is often hardest to deploy when faced with negative behaviors or attitudes. In these circumstances it is very easy to judge both the situation and the person in a negative way. In these circumstances, I have found it useful to remind myself of something that leadership expert Peter Docket wrote about in his book, Leading from the Jump Seat. There Docker describes how all negative action stems from fear, while on the other hand positive action stems from love. If faced with a situation where you are negatively judging a person and struggling to respond empathetically, take a beat and try to understand what may be happening under the surface — what fears may be triggering the behaviors that you don’t like in the person you are dealing with and what fears their behavior maybe triggering in you.
How can empathy help leaders navigate the complexities of leading diverse teams and ensure inclusivity?
Understanding that diverse teams bring with them diverse perspectives, backgrounds and cultures is a critical part of leadership. It is important to try and bring awareness to the many unconscious biases that we all have in this regard, and which are products of who we are as people. Bringing empathy when leading people who have different race, culture, gender or sexual orientation may be challenging, but bringing an open-mindedness and curiosity to situations is a good first step. This is something I have learnt first-hand working with wonderful diverse WOBI teams on four continents over the past two decades.
Are there potential pitfalls or challenges associated with being an empathetic leader? How can these be addressed?
Be sure that empathy with those whom you lead does not distract you from the broader goal and mission of the company. If you believe a decision is right for the company, and as such, for the majority of its stakeholders, then you need to be able to act accordingly. Don’t allow yourself to put off acting out of concern for how a decision may be received.
As someone steering the ship, what thoughts or concerns often keep you awake at night? How do those thoughts influence your daily decision-making process?
Ultimately most of my concerns and thoughts come back to delivering for WOBI’s clients. I want to ensure that we give them the experience and value that they have come to expect from WOBI. There are a huge number of moving parts that go into making that a reality. But it can also be a source of strength. If all decisions are viewed through the lens of what the ultimate impact will be for our clients, it can provide guidance in terms of the direction to go. Of course, the challenge is to make sure that you really understand your clients in this regard (there can often be a lot of noise) and stay laser focused on that. That said, I would say getting enough quality sleep as a leader is something I have put more and more emphasis on. Finding evening routines that allow you to disconnect and sleep better definitely sets you up for success when it comes to managing stress and making better decisions as a consequence!
You are a person of great influence. If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be?
For the last two years WOBI has been promoting the role of purpose in business. We believe that business can be one of the greatest drivers of positive change in the world — promoting innovation and opportunities that can ultimately have a profoundly positive impact on the lives of millions of people around the globe. We believe that integrating a sense of larger purpose into the mission of organizations and in turn into people’s daily work, has the potential to engage people even more and tap even further into the unique talents of each and every individual. The purpose revolution has already started and at WOBI we hope that we are able to play a small part in driving it forward.
How can our readers further follow you online?
Please follow me on LinkedIn where I share ideas and concepts from some of the many great leaders with whom I have worked over the years.
https://www.linkedin.com/in/christopherstanley1/
Thank you for the time you spent sharing these fantastic insights. We wish you only continued success in your great work!
Chris Stanley Of WOBI USA On How Empathy Will Affect Your Leadership was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.