TEDx Talking: Teri Kingston On What You Need To Know To Secure, Prepare, and Deliver a Highly Effective TEDx Talk
Fine-tuned delivery and storytelling skills are essential. This means having an understand of the role of timing, cadence, pace, pauses, body language and allowing for audience reaction affect your overall results. The story is yours and will be the vehicle to drive your message home into the hearts and minds of the audience.
In a world that is more connected than ever, the power of a well-crafted message to inspire, educate, and evoke change cannot be understated. TEDx Talks have emerged as a prestigious platform for sharing ideas worth spreading, reaching a global audience and creating impact on a grand scale. In this series, we are discussing the process of delivering a TEDx Talk that resonates and leaves a lasting impression. We are talking with experts who have successfully navigated the TEDx journey, including TEDx speakers, speaking coaches with a focus on TEDx preparations, and organizers involved in the selection and coaching of speakers. As part of this series, we had the pleasure of interviewing Teri Kingston.
Teri Kingston is a public speaking and TEDx Speaker Coach. In 2023 she was listed as one of Canada’s Top Ten Speaking Coaches. She works with executives, thought-leaders and people with a passion to share ideas on one of the largest platforms in the world, the TEDx stage. Teri shares her unique insights on effective public speaking with her executive speech coach clients, and her private TEDx clients. She is particularly effective when helping STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Medicine) speakers explain technical subject matter to non-technical audiences.
Her own TEDx talk, “Can We Live Better by Talking About Dying?” was viewed over 40K times in the first 24 hours of being posted.
A member of Toastmasters International since 2002, a Distinguished Toastmaster (DTM) since 2008. She has participated in many contests at the district level and recently placed first in the International Speech Contest for District 45 (Maine, New Hampshire, Vermont
New Brunswick, Nova Scotia, Prince Edward Island, Newfoundland & Labrador).
Through her business, Real Impact Speaking, she helps to amplify presentation skills using TED-style storytelling techniques. Teri understands how to help speakers discover, design and develop their best talks. Her mission is to help people get their valuable perspectives and ideas out into the world in a way that will truly resonate with any audience every time.
Teri lives in Saint Andrews by the Sea, New Brunswick, Canada, because it is postcard pretty and on the border with Maine. This allows her to be as close as possible to children and grandchildren who live way too far away. When she can’t visit them, she consoles herself with chocolate!
Thank you so much for your time! I know that you are a very busy person. Our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us your “Origin Story”? Can you tell us the story of how you grew up?
Although I was born in Liverpool, England we left when I was five. My mother was very ill, and her doctor suggested we search out a better climate. We found that in Bermuda! Growing up in an island paradise was idyllic to say the least.
We moved many times in the years to come and were uprooted once again when we moved to Canada when I was thirteen.
I felt like a plant with shallow roots, easily lifted out and put down somewhere else to thrive.
We moved houses, a lot! It was a hobby of my mother’s long before “flip this house” became popular.
Uprooted, transplanted.
My first marriage was to a young officer cadet. And, you guessed it, we started moving and moving and moving!
I became an expert at packing, moving, unpacking, settling into a new community and then, starting the whole process all over again. I started to hate the sound of packing tape.
I was 47 years old when we stopped moving. I was divorced by then and needed to find a “real job”. As a former Officer’s wife I had managed the home,10 moves in 16 years, two great kids, over 100 piano students, directed choirs, played for musicals, acted in plays…you name it, I did it. But, never worked for anyone other than myself.
However, burn-out happens quickly after divorce. The piano teaching came to an end when I realized I was turning into the type of teacher I hated! I was cranky, impatient and, quite frankly, bored!
I started working for the Federal Government in Canada and lived the “cubicle life” for the next 12 years.
Can you tell us a bit about what you do professionally, and what brought you to this specific career path?
During a dry spell at work, stumbled on an announcement about a communication and leadership organization (Toastmasters International) and decided to give them a try. The weekly meetings became my creative playground. Writing 5–7-minute speeches about anything and everything brought my brain back to life. Standing at the front of the room and sharing words I had written made me feel alive.
The program was well- structured for a creative, ADHD type such as me. Small assignments, immediate feedback, lots of opportunities for quick wins. I continued to fall in love with the program more each month.
In years to come, I would triple my salary in the government using the skills I learned in these weekly meetings. Even better? I met my second husband in a Toastmaster contest!
When you marry for the second time in your 50’s, you are not really expecting to celebrate even a 25-year anniversary.
I did, however, expect to sail into our golden years, end of life years together with this gorgeous man of my dreams.
And then, he got sick. I will always remember the day we sat in the Doctor’s office at the Heart Institute. After almost a year of Harry feeling increasingly worse, we finally had an answer.
“The good news is, it’s not cancer”, our Dr said. Our relief was palpable.
“The not so good news is that you have a rare heart and lung disease. We have great meds to help manage your condition, but I have to tell you that it is, at this time, incurable”.
5 seconds, one diagnosis and our lives were changed irrevocably.
We both became advocates and spokespeople for the national organization that helps patients and caregivers all over Canada deal with this disease (PHACanada.ca)
I became a fierce advocate for the caregivers of our patients as I started to see the toll that watching Harry slowly fade was taking on me and my fellow caregivers.
5 years from the day of his diagnosis, he passed away in June of 2017.
Those 5 years were filled with love, learning and loss.
In year 4 of his journey, I quit my government job so I could simply do the only job that mattered then. Spending as much time with Harry as I could, while I could.
The lessons learned about anticipatory grief almost put me in the grave ahead of him.
Meanwhile, he continued to encourage me to coach, mentor and teach others to be great storytellers and speakers.
Along the way, I kept studying storytelling, building my own skills and then, getting certified as public speaking coach and starting my own business -Real Impact Speaking — in order to have meaningful work to lean into in the years to come without him.
Thank you for all that. Let’s now turn to the main focus of our discussions. Can you tell us a bit about your particular experience with TEDx talks?
It was during one of Harry’s long hospital stays that I stumbled upon Chris Anderson’s book “TED Talks” and realized that TED style speaking with its emphasis on storytelling and “one idea worth spreading” was my new muse.
I am a teacher at heart and when I learn something new, I love to share my new passion with others. I bought programs and books and took storytelling courses galore.
I started offering “Get Ready for TED” workshops in my Ottawa community. One of those workshops came to the attention of someone who was organizing a TEDx event for the first time at a local community college. They asked if I would be interested in coaching the speakers for this first event. That was in 2015 and have not stopped coaching speakers since.
I went on to be an event coach for two major TEDx events in Ottawa Canada for the next 4 years. These events took place 6 months apart. I would finish coaching one set of speakers and then it would be time to sit in on the selection committee to choose speakers for the next one. It was not uncommon for me to spend 30–40 hours coaching each speaker to get them ready for their big moment!
Every role at a TEDx event is a volunteer role so all of this was done with no pay.
I no longer coach for events but have built my own international private practice with clients as far away as New Zealand and as close as my own neighbourhood.
I believe every coach needs to “walk their talk” and knew I would be a more effective coach if I had my own experience of speaking on the coveted red dot. As Harry was fading, I was working away on my own TED worthy story with various coaches, as well as learning from the amazing speakers I was exposed to at each event. It was a distraction and a desirable goal that kept me going in some of the toughest years of my life.
I picked away at my own idea over the years, started doing the deep research necessary to provide the data, stories and statistics needed to build an application that would get me my own YES.
It would take me many tries but finally, in August of 2021 I got that coveted YES! Less than 4 weeks later in September of 2021 I stepped onto the stage at TEDxUNB (Fredericton, New Brunswick) to share my own idea.
“Can we live better by talking about dying” came out of my experience helping my husband as he “headed home”. It is based on my deep heart desire that we need to talk about dying freely and easily to help those we love have a “good, gentle death”.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6Qj8g1DVxA&t=7s]
So, I have coached TEDx for years, I have given a TEDx talk and, last year I authored a step-by-step guide to help others “Get Ready for TED”!
Before we talk about the details, let’s consider the big picture. Preparing for a TEDx talk and securing it obviously requires a lot of mindshare, bandwidth, resources, and energy. From your personal experience, why is it worth it to invest all that to do a TEDx talk?
The first question to ask yourself is why you want to give a TEDx talk in the first place. It cannot be to promote your business or services or a book you have written. Those things will show up in your bio and event marketing etc but they should not be the driving factors.
I have yet to coach a single speaker who has not stepped off the red dot after their talk is over who has not said one of two things:
1)I had no idea it would take THIS much time and energy to do a talk (even though we always told them in the briefings!).
2) I had NO idea I would learn that much about myself along the way!
I see the entire TED experience; from finding your idea, to getting accepted, getting coached, diving deeper into your idea than you ever thought you would need, stripping away ego, learning to manage stage fright and memory under pressure; as a journey of a lifetime!
It is like a crash course in mastering public speaking skills that will stay with you long after you leave the stage.
Being able to add “TEDx Speaker” to your CV or LinkedIN profile is such a source of pride and joy that it really is priceless.
TED just released their annual report for 2024. The attached graphic shows the most compelling reasons for wanting to give a talk!
Now, let’s talk about the how. Can you describe the application process for becoming a TEDx speaker? What are some common challenges faced in the application process that our readers should be forewarned about?
It is far easier to land in the TEDx “NO” pile than it is to get “YES — we want you on our stage”
Some stats I have read say that only 5% of people who apply get accepted.
From my years on selection committees, I can tell you what we saw over and over again in the hundreds of speaker applications we reviewed.
- Lack of clarity on what they wanted to talk about
- Talking around the subject without a clear purpose or call to action
- Not following word count instructions on the application form
- Focusing on a specific issue (e.g. domestic violence, mental health) without providing solutions
- Choosing topics that have been done over and over again without a new point of view or a novel approach to how to solve the issue
- Calling yourself a “motivational speaker”
- No connection with the local community where the event is being held. You can apply from out of town, but you do need to know the issues and culture of the place where you are applying to speak
- Having an agent or virtual assistant apply for you
- Not submitting a well-crafted video to accompany your application.
- Submitting a late form
- Not understanding the difference between your regular “keynote” speeches and the specific style and culture of a TEDx talk.
Is there a website where you can apply for a TEDx talk? How do you apply and submit? How can you find out about all of the TEDx’s that are available?
There are a few ways to start your search. You can google “open applications for TEDx near me”. It can lead you down many rabbit holes though. Many of the suggestions are out of date or missing information you need to find the application form.
The fastest and most comprehensive source for TEDx events all over the world is the event page on TED.com.
I suggest you open your browser and pop in the link below, this will take you to the event page.
https://www.ted.com/tedx/events?year=2023
You will see an “Explore TEDx Events” search bar that gives you choices of location, year and month.
You can narrow your search by putting in the year you hope to speak, a specific location, or even the month.
You will need to search 4–6 months ahead of your current date. You can try 2–3 months out but chances are that those events have already chosen their speakers.
The first thing you will see is a map full of blue dots. These dots represent a specific event.
Scroll down to the list below the map. This is where you will find the information you need. Events are listed week by week for the search criteria you put in. You will see the names of the events in the list in bold and hyperlinked. That link takes you to a landing page.
This is where it can get a little frustrating.
There is a black banner at the top of each page with the date and location. Some events post the theme here, some don’t. Some have a link to their webpage where you can get more information. This may only appear a few months before the actual event date.
The best events have a 4–6 month lead time, meaning they start their speaker selection process well ahead of the actual event date. This gives them time to review 100’s of applications and start the speaker curation process.
However, not all TEDx events are curated the same way. Some open applications for a limited window of time, some don’t open applications at all and do personalized searches for the speakers and thought-leaders they want on their stages. Events usually post full instructions on their website. It is crucial that you follow their explicit instructions to the letter.
The x in TEDx means that each event team can decide how they handle their application process.
Once you find an event that you think suits your needs, it is time for a bit more research before you use your valuable time to apply. Event websites usually have videos of speakers from previous years. You will want to have a good look at those videos to see if the audio and video production are high quality. TED has high standards for the videos they will post to the TEDx YouTube channel and even higher for the ones they choose to host on TED.com.
- Check out the Facebook pages and Instagram posts for the event and see what the “culture” for that event feels like. This type of research will also serve you well when it comes to a possible call-back interview or live audition which might be part of their application process. Choosing the right event for you is the first step.
- Realizing that you only have one chance a year can be hard to swallow.
- Researching past events will help you decide where to focus your energy.
When you find an event that seems promising, follow them on whatever social media they prefer (FB, Instagram,LinkedIN, even TikTok). This will give you a sense of their unique culture and issues/challenges/interests they have in their community.
Go to their event website and sign-up for their newsletter. Show your willingness to be part of their community before and after the event, not just during.
What strategies did you use or would you recommend to ensure that a talk is engaging and impactful?
Talks are engaging and have lasting and memorable impact when they keep the focus on the audience not on the speaker. The message and the call to action and not about the ego or personality of the speaker. It’s not about you!
This means creating moments where you ask the audience to reflect on what you are saying or the stories you are sharing. This can be as simple as asking questions that bring them into the speech or the scene you are sharing. It means using timing, pacing and pauses to allow the audience to absorb what you are saying, especially when emotions are high.
The best talks are like a musical score that has highs and lows, tension and release, harmony and discord, louds and soft passages and a brilliant resolution.
Using your own stories and delivering them with a natural, conversational style will bring the audience along on the story journey with you.
There’s a saying from Mark Twain about how it takes more time to prepare for a five-minute talk than for a two-hour talk. The point is that crystallizing an idea and using the exact words is much more difficult than a freeform talk. So, how does a person do that? How does a person boil down an idea into five minutes?
This is so true! There is another famous quote from 1750 when Benjamin Franklin composed a letter describing his groundbreaking experiments involving electricity and sent it to a member of the Royal Society in London. Franklin excused the length of his report as follows: “I have already made this paper too long, for which I must crave pardon, not having now time to make it shorter”.
The key point here is that it takes time, determination and skill, to whittle a huge idea, a burning passion, down to its most important parts. I call it the “sword of Zoro” editing where you ruthlessly cut out anything that is fluff, extraneous or fill. Most people over-write in their first drafts which is a great place to start.
The editing process must drive your message along from start to finish.
Having a “foundational phrase” that summarizes your talk helps. As one of my coaches (Craig Valentine) is fond of saying “the phrase determines what stays”.
Being very clear of your final destination helps you to create a throughline that you hang your stories, data, explanations and research on.
At some point in the talk development process, we go through every sentence in the talk and pull-out unnecessary adjectives, adverbs and overly long explanations. The beauty of tightening your content this way means you can allow time to pause, transition from one thought to another, give the audience time to digest along the way.
The best advice is this; if you have a time slot of 8 minutes, write a 6.5-minute talk and take 8 minutes to deliver it well. Most people try to shove 10 minutes worth into 8 minutes. Craig also says, “if you shove too much information in, you shove your audience out”!
Most of us can think of maybe half a dozen different topics that they could speak about. How does a person choose, and say “Okay, this is the one for a TED talk”? How do they choose which of all their ideas should be the one?
How do I know I have an “idea worth spreading”?
The true secret sauce to any great TED talk or TED style presentation is that it is based on ONE idea worth spreading.
Not 7 tips, not 10 hacks, not 3 best ways to …
ONE idea that you can articulate in fewer than 10 words.
Then, you choose stories, facts, data, research that illustrate and support that one idea and take your audience on a journey.
Sounds simple right? Easy? Not so much!!
“Finding your speaker idea is one of the most important steps to take. Think of yourself as a journalist who needs to find a good angle for a story”. (TED.com)
Your journey to the TEDx red dot starts with figuring out what your ONE idea is!
This is the time for total curiosity about your TED idea. It may not be what you think it is when you start out!
Again, quoting Chris Anderson: “…that’s why ideas really matter. If communicated properly, they’re capable of changing, forever, how someone thinks about the world, and shaping their actions both now and well into the future. Ideas are the most powerful force shaping human culture.
ONE idea you can articulate in fewer than 10 words. ONE idea that answers a question the audience does not already have an answer for.
My own idea became the title for my TEDx talk as it covers all the elements noted above.
“Can we live better by talking about dying?”
That is a question the audience really wants answered.
My TEDx idea came out of my personal experience with Harry. Our story of coping with loss became the centrepiece of the change in thinking I wanted the audience to experience. Fear fades in the face of brave conversations for the one leaving and those being left behind. Knowing that more than 55 thousand people have heard our story and have taken on the daunting task of starting those conversations gently and early, helps ease my own sense of pain and loss.
Feedback is crucial in shaping a compelling TEDx talk. Can you describe how to seek out and incorporate feedback during the talk’s preparation? Who do you turn to for honest critiques, and how do you iterate on your presentation based on the feedback received?
There are several ways to receive feedback.
Part of the mandate of each TEDx event is that they will provide speaker coaching to all who get accepted to speak on their stage. The chosen speakers do not pay extra for this coaching. This is one reason I suggest you find events with a long “lead” time of 3 -4 months if not more from when you get your YES to when you step onto the stage. It is one of the huge benefits of being accepted as a speaker.
The quality and the experience of the coaches can vary widely though. I have been asked by some of my clients to continue coaching them, even when they have an assigned coach, as they felt they needed more. As you can imagine, this needs to be handled with a great deal of respect for the primary coach and needs to be very collaborative.
Both TEDxOttawa and TEDxKanata have a process of peer group coaching as well as one on one time with an assigned coach. I would get my speakers together as a small group to hear each other’s early drafts, and, as the day drew closer, practice delivering their talks to each other.
The group rehearsals were part of the preparation timeline and were mandatory. The speakers also received feedback from the event curators and Executive Directors. Then, with the coaches’ help, they would incorporate the feedback and bring the next iteration to the next practice.
This really helped to keep the speakers focused on not leaving things to the last minute and helped them be as prepared as they could be.
I would also bring my speakers to Toastmaster meetings to get more feedback.
The danger lies in asking unqualified people (i.e. helpful spouses and friends) who may not understand that speaking from a TEDx stage is not the same as a keynote or other types of speeches. Sometimes their feedback would pull a speaker off track and really rock their confidence.
The quality of feedback and advice is only as good as the experience level of the person giving it!
Let’s talk about the actual delivery of an excellent TEDx Talk. Most people are scared of speaking in public. How do you manage the stage fright before the talk?
Managing stage fright or performance anxiety is a huge part of good TEDx coaching. It starts with how you write the talk in the first place. When there is a strong speech structure, with powerful, personal stories that bring the idea to life, and data and research to support the idea, the speaker focus is on delivering the message not on themselves as the messenger.
As mentioned earlier, peer coaching, live rehearsals, and not leaving things to the last minute make a huge difference in how prepared the speaker feels.
I have studied performance anxiety for years (having almost destroyed myself with nerves as a pianist) and make sure my speakers learn grounding techniques, meditation and tapping to help manage their energy.
It is also important to know that it’s ok to feel nervous! It is normal, and it is a sign that the body’s “fight or flight mechanism” — i.e. the production of adrenaline — is working properly. Performance anxiety can manifest itself in many ways; the most common physical symptoms are:
- Dry mouth
- Moist hands
- Trembling hands
- Nausea
- Palpitations
Focusing on symptoms we don’t want helps to keep them in place, feeds them, and lets them take over. It is much better to observe and acknowledge with a simple… “Now that’s interesting…”
Or, a phrase that is used in some trauma recovery therapy is; “thank you Amygdala for taking care of me! I know that we can handle this!”
Telling ourselves to relax or take deep breaths is not as helpful as you think. Unless you have practiced this type of “biofeedback”.
Better to “imagine” what it feels like to stand on stage and be fully present. This engages the parasympathetic nervous system which oversees restoration and relaxation.
“What would it feel like if….”
Olympic athletes and professional musicians use visualization to see a perfect performance from beginning to end.
The best tip of all is to focus on the audience.
Instead of dwelling on anxiety, shift focus to the audience and their needs. Remember that you are there to deliver value and share information with them. By shifting your attention away from yourself and toward the audience, you can reduce self-consciousness and anxiety. Becoming an “audience-centric” speaker is key.
One last point here.
It is very important NOT to memorize your talk using rote memorization. This is the most undependable way to remember your talk. This often results in a robotic delivery that seems like the speaker is “reading the notes from behind their eyeballs” and creates a big disconnect with the audience. It is also very easy to get derailed, lose your place and forget what comes next.
Using a “story journey” approach to the talk development and internalizing the talk until it is as easy to remember as the words to “Happy Birthday” is a huge part of the TEDx coaching process.
What can a person do to ensure that people will remember the talk and that it won’t just go in one ear and out the other? Can you share how you gauge and adapt to audience reactions in real time during your talk to ensure maximum engagement?
This is part of the design of the talk from day one.
Having a memorable phrase that helps anchor your message and can be repeated like a refrain as the talk evolves really helps. If you can say it in fewer than 10 words, it helps the message to stick.
Stories need to be told using the best stage presentation skills you can muster. The best way to keep an audience engaged is to have them “re-live” your story as you tell it. This involves a lot of presentation and storytelling techniques such as use of dialogue, vivid imagery, slides that enhance your message.
A natural, conversational delivery style where the audience members can see themselves in your story is key. Confidence, being well practiced and rehearsed adds to the audience experience.
Based on your experience or research, what are the “Five Things You Need To Deliver a Highly Effective TEDx Talk”?
- Begin with the end in mind. (Stephen Covey) What do you want your audience to take away from your talk? What do you want them to think, do, feel or act on when you have finished speaking? What is your big why (why this speech, why this audience, why now?). Knowing your call to action and how to drive that home in your closing minutes will make your message memorable.
- Create a “Story Journey Map”. Every journey has a preparation stage and includes a desirable destination. You need to know the exact route you want to take your audience on, how long it is going to take to get there, how nourished they will be along the way, how to stop them from being bored and, most of all, how to get them to jump off at the end of the journey with a changed perspective or a desire to change or take action.
- Choose your supporting cast. What stories will you use to help your audience understand? What facts, data, and research do you need? Can you put a unique lens on how you describe your idea that is novel, emotional and memorable?
- Fine-tuned delivery and storytelling skills are essential. This means having an understand of the role of timing, cadence, pace, pauses, body language and allowing for audience reaction affect your overall results. The story is yours and will be the vehicle to drive your message home into the hearts and minds of the audience.
- Be sure to engage a qualified coach to guide you on your journey. Giving a TEDx talk may be the most important talk you ever give. It has the potential to reach thousands, if not millions of people around the world. I don’t think I would have been able to stand in front of an audience of 55 thousand people to give my talk in person but over 55 thousand people have watched it! My message now lives in the hearts and minds of more people that I ever dreamed possible.
After delivering a TEDx talk, what strategies do you use to maximize its impact and reach? Could you share how to engage with your audience through social media, follow-up events, or other means to encourage action or further discussion on the topic?
The really good events have great media and PR teams who all work quite hard from the time the speaker line-up is announced and throughout the event viewing. They do also encourage all speakers to spread the word within their own networks in order to increase activity.
Many events use hashtags on the day of the event to drive up viewing or have “viewing parties when they know the videos are ready to be released by the TEDx YouTube team.
I will be totally honest here and say this is not in my area of expertise. I know speakers who treat their talk like a book launch and do a lot of email and social media posts to promote the talk before it is released on the TEDx YouTube channel. I know others who pay to have “eyes on their talk” to increase the numbers of views.
I did none of that for my own talk. In fact, I did not know that the videos from TEDxUNB2021 had been released to the public until a stranger messaged me on Facebook to ask how my talk had attracted so many views so quickly! Nine thousand people watched it in the first 2 hours, 48 thousand in the first weekend and then it slowed to 55 thousand plus where it sits today. This was totally organic.
I believe it was the title that captured the YouTube algorhythm of people searching to the answer to the question in my title. “Can we live better by talking about dying”. I still feel it was pure luck with a touch of my late husband Harry pulling levers from “the other room”!!
How can our readers watch your TEDx talk and follow your work?
My talk is on the main TED channel and on YouTube.
(https://www.ted.com/talks/teri_kingston_can_we_live_better_by_talking_about_dying)
More stories and detailed explanations on how to apply are in my book “Get Ready for TED when TED is ready for you” which is available on Amazon.
Details about my signature program: All-Inclusive Journey to TED are found on
my Website: https://realimpactspeaking.com/get-ready-for-ted/
LinkedIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/terikingston
Thank you so much for sharing these important insights. We wish you continued success and good health!
TEDx Talking: Teri Kingston On What You Need To Know To Secure, Prepare, and Deliver a Highly… was originally published in Authority Magazine on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.